Big Life Stuff

Well, now that that tedious first-post business is out of the way, let’s chat about life, shall we?

I am frightened of a lot of things.  Heights, loneliness, snakes, spiders…  The list goes on.  But right up there, at the very top of the list, is change.  I am deathly terrified of change.  Change is scary!  It leads to terrifying things, like growing up!  And yet, here I am, making what we call Big Life Changes.  Yes, I realize that we just had a discussion about the fact that I am not moving away from my hometown and all that; but we also just had a discussion about the fact that this is still a journey.  Remember?  Good.  Because this is the part of the journey that scares me.

Big Life Change #1: Having a Big Girl Job.

So, I have this job.  It is the perfect job.  I cannot even tell you how much I love this job.  When I was a tiny little Fox, there was an amazing woman named Miss B who taught at my elementary school.  (Her name, of course, was not really Miss B.  But it was nigh unpronounceable for little mouths and Miss B was more fun to say.)  She taught Science Lab, which meant she let us make pizzas and little foil boats and had bunnies in her classroom and taught us the stories of constellations and all the things that make science the best thing ever.  Of course, on the list of things I wanted to be (right after astronaut and ballerina) was Miss B.  I’d get to do that fun stuff ALL DAY.  Can you even imagine?!  Well, I can.  Very vividly.  Fast forward many years, and join me in the spring of this year, student teaching at that self-same school, where my second grade teacher is now the principal and I am building a pond in the hallway to teach ecosystems and rolling out toilet paper to show how far apart the planets are.  I’m still a science geek, loving every second of the fun and shenanigans of science.  And it gets noticed.  Fast forward again to the summer, sitting nervously in a conference room with teachers I’ve known my whole life (and some I only met months ago), interviewing for my dream job.  Of course, I won’t get it.  Nobody gets their dream job as their first job.  Duh.  Except, I do.

And this is where I am now.  The new Miss B, making goo and s’mores, anemometers and bricks, fossils and crab habitats.  Doing all the things that make science fun, all day, every day.  It’s perfect and crazy.  And a lot more work than I expected…  But that’s part of having the dream job.  Yes, you work all the time.  But you love it.  All the time.

Big Life Change #2:  Getting an apartment.

AH!  I’ve had a bad experience in the past with roommates (Not you, Amy, if you’re reading this!  You were perfect and any time you want to live with me, I will have you!), so I’m wary of getting a roommate.  (Read: adamantly refusing to get one.  Period.)  Therefore, I am going to be living on my own.  For a family girl, this is a really intimidating prospect.  I rely on my family a great deal, to help me enforce good habits, to break bad ones, to remind me of things I know to be true, and to help me unwind when times are hard.  Coming home to an empty house each day will be…  Interesting.  And while I know that I can live on my own and that I’m a strong, independent woman…  What if I can’t and I’m not?  As they say, only one way to find out…

Anywho, that’s my Big Life Stuff.  It’s scary and exciting and all part of the journey.

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About chloebennett

I'm a Texas girl on an adventure!
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